A Letter to God

dear Lord Jesus,

my walk with You certainly hasn't been one in the park.

if anything, it's like fighting a different battle everyday. many times I found myself overwhelmed by the amount of baggage I need to unload and the many areas of my life that need ironing out. I feel like a patchwork quilt unraveling at the seams, only because You're unpicking them, and it hurts.

head knowledge tells me that I will be safe in Your arms, and in good faith, to surrender all circumstances to You. but when life strikes me at the hardest places, even this mustard seed of faith ceases to exist for me, and I go in search of comfort and affirmation, more often than not in the wrong places.


either I am suffering from spiritual amnesia, or I am choosing to deny the truth. the crave for human approval is different from the need for human approval. in reality, I do not need anyone to give me the green light, or to  affirm my existence. I need not fear them, for You have created all of us, and I have You on my side. because You go before me in all circumstances, my enemies are struck down before I even have the chance to lay eyes on them. because of that, the battle is already won before I can fight it.

dear Lord, You have never promised me that the Christian faith will be a bed of roses. but what You've promised is your everlasting faithfulness, and the assurance that You will never leave nor abandon me when I need You the most.

engrave that not just in my head, but on my heart Lord. keep my eyes peeled on You, and help me not lose focus, as I am wont to do. I want to walk with you, not just in the good, but in the strife. whenever I forget, nudge me into memory: that You've never ever let go, once.

allow me to trust You no matter what life throws me, no matter how big Goliath might seem, no matter how tall the mountain in front of me stands.

for God You see all things. let me let You be You.

in Jesus's name,
amen.